This came up in conversation recently and I realized I had no good answer. Public first meetings are non-negotiable. Coffee shop, bar, anywhere visible.
Anonymous broadcasting options are more common now on gay cam platforms — welcome change. Regional filtering is critical for gay dating outside of major metro areas.
Scruff tends to attract a slightly older and more relationship-focused crowd than Grindr.
Basic precautions I follow:
- A VPN helps with general privacy but is not a complete solution for anonymity.
- Video call before you meet — fastest way to confirm someone is who they claim to be.
- Never share your real last name, address, or workplace before meeting someone in person.
- Payment requests from matches should always be treated as a scam regardless of the story.